home sweet home
by kristy87
Summary: Sequel to the favor! One year later, Christmas and this year Sara jumped over her shadow and invited her mother and brother over to spend xmas with her, Grissom and Gretchen.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own CSI : (

AN: okay, I was asked to write this all the time so I finally started it. This is the sequel to "the favor".

Yes I do know that it's insane to start a third WIP, but I should be able to update all my fan fics once a week. : )

**Warning:** FLUFF all the way. Well also angst, due to the fact that there'll be a lot of Sara/Laura Sidle interaction etc. Don't say you haven't been warned. : )

Summary: One year later, Christmas and this year Sara "jumped over her shadow" and invited her mother and brother over to spend x-mas with her, Grissom and Gretchen.

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**Home sweet home**

chapter 1

Totally tired Sara took seat on one of the chairs in the break room, relieved thanks to the final chance to rest for at least five minutes. The last weeks had been a torture. Christmas shopping, Christmas decorating, Christmas cards writing, this whole Christmas stuff was starting to piss her off.

She hadn't cared about it at all before, but this year was special! This was the first Christmas that she and Grissom would spend together as a real couple. Real. Not like last year. No this year it was special, this year they were together, for almost exactly one year they were together now.

And she wanted this day to be special. Wanted it to be special because for the first time in her life she would spend Christmas with a loving family, _her_ family. Yes, that was what they were now, she and Grissom, a little family. They were only two humans and a dog, but still… this was more than she had ever dared to dream about.

And there was something else that was special about this year's Christmas. Actually two things and she didn't know what was making her more nervous, what was making her more anticipated…

Her mother and brother would come to Las Vegas, for the first time in almost 15 years Sara would meet her mother again, she would not only see her mother, no together with her brother, Grissom and Gretchen, they would have dinner on the twenty-fifth, they would spend the whole evening together and this was driving her crazy.

And all this because of 'thing number two'. And this filled her with so much positive anticipation that it almost let her heart explode.

Her heart was jumping every time that she looked at the ring on her ring-finger. The small, shining diamond, the white-golden band…

And on that evening, during dinner, she and Grissom would tell their families about their engagement. Sara hadn't seen any importance to tell her mother about it, but Grissom had convinced her that she needed to tell her mother and not only on the phone. And somehow Sara also started to feel as if she needed to tell her mother about it. They had never had a loving relationship, one that is usual between mother and daughter, such a bond had never existed between them, but now… now Sara's life had changed. In this one year a life, of that Sara had thought that it could never meet the image that an average person has of a 'happy life', turned into a life that made Sara feel as if she was in heaven, every single day, every single minute. And Sara hoped that maybe her relationship with her mother could also change, at least a bit. She wanted her mother to attend the wedding ceremony, she wanted her mother to be there, just like most women want their mothers to be there at their wedding!

A soft smile flashed over her lips when the thought of coming home tonight ran through her mind. She wanted, needed nothing else but to lie in his arms on their sofa, watching TV together or listening to some music. Feeling him holding her, letting her hands run over his chest, kissing him…

She opened her cell phone, dialed and waited for him to answer her call with her heart beating fast in her chest. Like it always did when she thought of him.

"Yeah?" His sleepy voice sounded through the phone.

"Hey." She said softly and sweet.

"Hey." He answered with the same sweetness.

"Are you already back at home?"

"Why back?" He asked a little surprised.

"From the airport… How is your mother? I hope her flight wasn't too stressing."

"My …mother… damn!"

"Don't say that you forgot to pick up your mother."

"I… I slept until the sound of my ringing cell phone woke me up…I …"

Sara rolled with her eyes. "Great." She said with a slight angry undertone in her voice. "Her plane was scheduled to land at three thirty PM. It's almost five now." Her voice turned slightly desperate.

"Can't you pick her up?"

"Me?" A laugh of frustration escaped her. "You don't honestly want me to drive to the airport now, after working a double shift, after…"

"But you're off the clock from five PM on, it's way faster from the lab to the airport than from here to the airport."

"You do mean this…" She sighed in frustration. "I've been working all day…"

"…I've been working too."

She rolled with her eyes again. "Oh yeah, I forgot, you've been teaching three hours at university today, what a tough work." The sarcasm in her voice was there on purpose.

"Honey…" He was about to start his soft plea.

"…you know you'll have to…"

"…make this up to you. I know."

She could imagine the grin on his lips.

"I love you."

She couldn't help but forget about the anger that had been rising up in her. "I love you too." She whispered softly.

"Are you nervous?" He changed the subject.

"Like hell." She confessed.

"Don't worry honey." His voice turned soft again. "I promise that everything will be alright."

"I'm scared. I… I don't know if I will manage to pick them up tomorrow…I… I mean I talked to her on the phone three weeks ago and that was it, I… "

"I will pick them up if you want me to." He offered.

A soft smile of relieve built up on her lips. "Thanks." She whispered.

"We'll see each other after you picked my mother up then, I guess."

She nodded. "I hate it when we see each other for so little time… I wish you'd still be working here."

"Don't hate it, don't be sad my love. Just look forward to come home tonight, to fall asleep in my arms, to…"

She grinned and she knew that he knew it too.

"Drive carefully."

"You know I will."

"And when my mother should start talking about the 'grandchild' theme you know what you have to say?"

"I know what I have to say." She chuckled softly.

"Good."

"Good." She grinned and closed her cell phone, grabbed her purse and left the break room to get her jacket from her locker.

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TBC

yeah I know maybe somehow boring... there'll be more action in the next chaptersI promise!


	2. Chapter 2

**disclaimer:** I do not own CSI

**AN** Sorry for this chapter being so late, real life has been stressing during the holiday time. Next chapter will be up on Saturday next week.

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chapter 2

How was she supposed to find Gretchen in this crowd of hastily running people? Sara sighed and wished that she'd never agreed in picking Grissom's mother up from the airport. Not only that it was almost impossible to find her there, when she _would_ find her she would be the one whom Gretchen would blame for being hours too late.

Sara had been searching in almost every hall but hadn't seen her, now she figured that Gretchen had probably taken seat in one of the cafés, so she was searching for her in those.

When she finally spotted her she felt relived, not because she had found her but because finding her meant being able to go home, and going home was all she wanted now. She wanted to enter their house and then wanted to twitch Grissom's nipples, because that was what hurt him the most. 'Being mad' was an understatement. And then she wanted nothing else but to sleep.

She entered the café and walked over to Gretchen's table. She took seat in front of her and it took a moment before Grissom's mother noticed her.

/Finally/ She signed and the expression in her face told Sara that Gretchen was also slightly pissed off.

/Sorry/ Sara signed back. /Gil overslept/

A bright smile built up on Gretchen's lips. /You learned to sign/

Sara nodded. /Gil taught me how to do it/

/At least he is good for something/ Gretchen signed grinning.

Sara chuckled. /How are you/

/I am good. Except for the time that I had to wait here. You look tired./

/I worked double shifts for the last weeks so that I could take this next week of./

/Do you want a coffee? I pay./

Sara smiled softly. Actually she wanted to sleep but she liked being with Gretchen. So she agreed. She ordered a coffee for herself and another one for Gretchen. Short after the coffee was served and paid Gretchen brought up the theme that Sara would have loved to avoid.

/So, when are you two going to make me a happy grandmother/ Gretchen asked.

Sara swallowed hard. Actually they had agreed in telling his mother something else, but Sara felt like she deserved a chance for revenge. /Gil does not want any children yet/

/I figured that he is the problem/ Gretchen signed thoughtfully. /So what could we do to change his mind? Let me think…/

/Oh I tried that. No chance./ _Great Sara, now you dug your own grave. When she's trying to convince Gil that children are his secret whish then_…

/But children are so wonderful. The most beautiful and wonderful evidence of the love that you two share/

/I think we both are not ready to be parents yet. I mean I have my job and it is really stressful and I'm not at home at night and sleep almost all day and Gil is teaching in the morning/

/Well one of you would have to stop working for a while. I don't see a problem there. Just imagine how wonderful a life with children is. And being scared of it is nothing unusual. But believe me, when you are holding your baby in your arms for the first time you will know that everything will be fine. You do not have to be the best mother in the world as long as you love your child and as long as you are doing your best./ Gretchen had a mission and that was obvious to Sara.

Sara swallowed hard again. /We just think that we shouldn't make our decisions too fast. We…/

/Oh come on. Just imagine how wonderful it would be. When you come home and your little son is already waiting for you and his eyes are shining so bright and he's smiling and so happy that his mommy is home. There is no greater gift than the love that a child feels for its parents./

Sara raised an eyebrow. She had to end this conversation before she'd make promises that she did not want to make. She glanced at her still full coffee cup and saw only one chance. She drank all the hot coffee at once, a burning pain growing worse and worse in her throat, but she wouldn't stop until the cup was empty. When she finished she hastily put the cup back on the table. She swallowed the pain and tried to not let Gretchen see that it was almost impossible to suppress the urge to scream.

She left her seat, ignoring that Gretchen hadn't even touched her cup yet. /We have to go now. I am sure that Gil is already wondering where we are./

Gretchen raised an eyebrow but followed Sara out of the café. Sara was glad that she couldn't talk with Gretchen during the ride home and when she entered their house she simply threw an angry look at Grissom and then headed for the kitchen to get some ice. Although her throat had stopped hurting, she figured that ice couldn't do any harm and she was not in the mood to have to justify herself any longer.

Grissom followed her after a while. Coming closer to her she let him put his arms around her waist, but when he tried to kiss her she turned her face away.

"What's wrong honey?" He asked brushing a strand of hair behind her ear.

"I am mad at you." She said, trying to sound angry.

"Mad at me?"

"Yes." She sighed.

He tried to kiss her again and this time she let him. Their lips met in a soft kiss, then he broke the contact of their lips. "Still mad at me?"

"Yeah." She whispered.

He kissed her again, this time he let his tongue slip over her lips, pleading for an invitation. Sara sighed and twined her arms around his neck, then she slightly opened her lips and let his tongue in.

When she broke the kiss she smiled softly. "I wish being mad at you would be easier."

Grissom grinned. "You didn't want to be mad at me because you love me too much to be mad at me."

Sara rolled with her eyes. "You and your theories. You should have started with that much earlier, like six years ago, then your mother probably would already have given up asking when we'd get a baby."

"So she asked you?"

"She did not only ask me, she tried to convince me how wonderful it is to have children."

"But did you tell her what we agreed to tell her?" Judging the expression in her face he knew that she hadn't. He sighed. "What did you tell her?"

"Well not what we agreed…" She said biting down on her bottom lip. "Let's forget about that and go to bed." She said trying to seduce him with her eyes.

"Sara, that doesn't work. Besides my mother will be out of the bathroom in about ten minutes and then we will have to eat with her and…"

Sara slowly opened the buttons of his shirts. "Ten minutes… can be a long time…" She whispered into his ear, kissing his neck from time to time.

"I get it, you will not tell me what you told her." He said grinning.

"Could you forget about your mother for a while and just make out with me? Because I really wouldn't feel good with the thought that you're still thinking about your mother while we're…"

"We are not going to…" He formed air quotes with his hands. "…make out."

"That makes me very sad." She said and winked.

"I will cheer you up later." He winked back and smirked.

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TBC


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I do not own CSI

AN: Next chapter...I hope it's not too boring :S

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chapter 3

Sara glanced over to Grissom who was reading in his textbook, seeming to be lost in thoughts. Absentminded he was crawling the silkily fur behind Muffin's ears. She sat up and placed her hand on his shoulder, dragging herself closer to him. "Why are you still awake?" She asked softly.

"I couldn't sleep." He whispered, placing a gentle kiss on her forehead. "I'm sorry, I didn't want to wake you up Honey."

"You didn't." She sighed and left the bed. "I'll be right back."

Grissom stopped crawling the dog. "Stomach cramps again?" He asked concerned, putting the book down.

She nodded while she put on her bathrobe.

Muffin whined, rolling on his back.

"You should go to a doctor, this is going on for weeks now."

"Only one and a half week. And I am sure that it's just because of all the stress I had. Working double shifts all week and all the Christmas trouble and in addition to this the upcoming meeting with my mother... I'm nervous and burned out and… I am sure that after this week everything will be alright again. Don't worry." She forced a soft smile. "And I guess the fur ball wants your attention." With that said Sara left the bedroom and headed for the bathroom.

When she returned Grissom had brought the dog back to its bed and had turned off the light. He helped her back into the bed and carefully covered her with the blanket. She snuggled up against his chest and he slipped his arm around her shoulders to hold her close to him.

He softly kissed her forehead. "I love you." He whispered.

Sara swallowed hard. Now she felt bad because of what she had told Gretchen. Grissom had been so sweet to her all the time and only because she had been a little stressed she had no right to tell his mother that he was the one who was responsible for the lack of grandchildren.

"Everything okay Honey?" He asked, still sounding concerned.

"I… I told your mother that… that you would be the one who doesn't want children."

"Well that's really not what we agreed to tell her." He answered softly.

"I'm so sorry. I…I was just…stressed out and annoyed by the fact that I had to search for your mother for so long. I know that's no excuse… I'm sorry."

Grissom chuckled. "Honey it's okay."

"I'm really sorry. Don't be mad at me."

Grissom leaned up and supported his weight on his elbow, Sara rolled on her back and reached up for his face with her hand. Her fingertips slowly caressed over his cheek. He placed his hand on her cheek and caressed her lips with his thumb. "I'm not mad at you. I don't care what my mother thinks. Although I would have preferred the other story."

"It would have been a lie to tell her that we are trying. I didn't feel well with telling lies….again."

"The difference between trying and practicing is not _that_ huge. And with telling her what you did tell her…"

"That was only half a lie. And the difference _is_ huge."

"Okay."

Sara sat up. "Okay?" She asked unbelieving.

"Yeah." He chuckled softly.

"There is a 'but' , is there?"

"No." He whispered and kissed her forehead again. "Now sleep honey."

"There is no 'but' ?" she asked still unbelieving.

"I can make up a 'but' for you if you want to be punished." He gave in, his hand travelling down from her shoulder to her hips.

She kissed his neck and his chin. "Let's say I will go to the airport together with you tomorrow."

He pulled away from her in disbelieve. "Are you sure that you want to do that?"

"I have to face my fear." She sighed. "And… when I want to get rid of these stomach cramps before we're having dinner tomorrow then I should maybe meet my mother before we're going to the restaurant."

Grissom caressed her back. "I'll be there with you, so don't worry Honey."

She softly kissed his lips. "I love you."

Suddenly Sara felt something nibbling on her toe. "What the hell…. Muffin!" She tried to free her toe from the puppy's grip.

Grissom laughed softly, he turned on the light and leaned over to the dog. Carefully he shoved his finger into the dog's mouth and opened it wider, so that Sara could free her toe.

"We can not even make a dog follow certain rules, how should we ever manage to bring up a child?" Sara said shaking her head.

Grissom picked the puppy up and looked at it. The puppy tilted its head. Grissom chuckled again. "You know he always pretends to be an angel, but he's such a little devil. He does not even want to sleep in his own bed."

Now Sara sat up. "Muffin, Gil bought such a nice dog bed for you… you should sleep there." She ran her hand through the dog's fur.

"You know, we were the ones who allowed him to sleep in our bed at first." Grissom admitted.

"See, our children would be so spoilt." She said grinning.

He kept still for a moment. "You really don't want to have children, do you?"

"I thought… Gil we talked about this before." Sara sighed. "We both said that we wouldn't be ready for this yet and that…"

"I know what we said Sara." He caressed her cheek.

Their eyes met. "Stop making the puppy look." She told him trying to sound strict. "Or I will make the angry cat look."

He sat the puppy back on the mattress. Then he dragged Sara closer to him. His lips met hers and they kissed passionately. She twined her arms around his neck and his arms slipped around her waist. She laid down on her back again, enjoying the feeling of his hands now slowly running over her stomach.

He pulled away from her after a while. He looked at her in silence, then their eyes met again. Sara felt a wave of heat running through her whole body. She reached up for his cheek and wanted to drag his face down to hers again, but he did not move. He just kept staring. Then after a while he broke the silence again. "Almost one year ago we also lay here and…"

She smirked. "That had definitely been the best Christmas I ever had."

There was a boyish grin on his lips and she remembered that he had grinned exactly the same way back then. She smiled softly at him, her hand slipping under his shirt. "Sometimes I still can't believe that all this is real." She said softly.

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TBC

okay I know that this was boring...sorry! I just couldn't think of anything better today...I apologize.


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I do not own CSI

AN: LOL this seems like I have no personal life, this is the third thing I publish today. But I have to confess that I already finished this chap 3 days ago, I just had no time to post it.

Enjoy...

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chapter 4

Oversleeping seemed not to be a one-time problem for the Grissom-Sidle household. Gladly Gretchen had woken them up just in time so that after a hastily exchange of gifts, Grissom and Sara had hurried to the airport.

Now when they were waiting in the arrival area they slowly calmed down from the run from the parking garage to the terminal. But Sara felt sick and she wasn't really able to hide it. Although she tried to. She didn't want Grissom to worry.

But he of course noticed. He softly put his arm around her shoulders. "Honey, what's wrong?"

"I'm okay." She insisted.

He pressed a soft kiss on her forehead. Then he sighed, his left hand softly touched her cheek, then he turned her face to his. "Still feeling sick?"

Finally she nodded.

"You should have drunk some good tea instead of coffee."

She sighed. "I can drink tea later." She freed herself from the embrace of his arm and gave a weak smile. "I will be right back."

Grissom nodded softly. "Okay."

Grissom watched her leave and in the same moment the first passengers entered the arrival hall. He wondered how he should ever spot Sara's brother and mother in this crowd of people. Sara only had one picture of her brother and none of her mother and he had seen that picture of Ben only once. He waited a while, hoping that Sara would return but she didn't.

Suddenly a man walked over to him. Grissom wondered if this could be Ben, but he wasn't sure, it might fit though, he thought.  
"Excuse me, are you Gil Grissom?" the man asked.

So it was really Ben. Grissom nodded. "Ben Sidle?"

"Yes." He answered and smiled.

And that smile would have discarded the last doubts. "Nice to finally meet you… and merry Christmas." Grissom smiled and they shook hands.

"Merry Christmas. I was looking forward to this. Sara told me so much about you." Ben told him. "Speaking of Sara, where is she?" He asked, glancing around the hall.

"Bathroom." Grissom answered short.

Ben nodded. "My mother is waiting over there." He pointed to a couple of seats.

Grissom and Ben walked over to the seats where only one woman was sitting. Grissom, although he had been able to hide it, was really nervous. He did not know a lot about Sara's mother and neither did he know how to behave around her. The situation itself, meeting the mother of his 'girlfriend', was completely new to him, but in addition to this everything he had heard about Sara's mother had not really sounded as if she was a warm-hearted, loving mother.

Laura Sidle left her seat and smiled at him. "Laura Sidle... Merry Christmas." She said and Grissom tried to find more clues about her personality in the way she spoke.

"Merry Christmas…Gil Grissom. Nice to meet you Misses Sidle." His hands were sweating. _This_ had never happened before.

"Where's Sara?" She asked after a moment of awkward silence.

"The Bathroom." Ben answered.

"She didn't feel well." Grissom added.

Laura nodded softly. Then silence followed again. Grissom really did not like this silence, so he thought of something he could say to not make this silence last too long. "Is this your first visit to Las Vegas?" He knew that it was, but at least this would break the silence for a moment.

"Yes. I don't travel much." Laura answered.

"I've been here once, but that was years ago. The city changes to fast, I would get lost in a minute." Ben said, laughing softly.

Grissom forced a smile. "I'm sure Sara will enjoy showing you around." Just a white lie.

In that moment Sara joined them. She softly leaned against Grissom's back, her hand lay on his shoulder. He turned to face her. "There she is." He softly kissed her on her cheek, then Sara took a deep breath.

She walked over to her brother and hugged him. "Hey Ben. Merry Christmas."

Ben pressed her close to him and put his arms around her. "Merry Christmas little Sis." Only slowly Sara pulled away from her brother, now the moment which she had feared so long was there. With shaking hands she walked over to her mother. "Merry Christmas Mom." She spoke softly.

"Merry Christmas Sara." Only for a second the two women hugged each other. Sara quickly pulled away back into Grissom's arms.

Grissom held her close to him, his hand brushing through her hair.

Silence.

Until Ben, who was probably the only one of them who could deal with the awkwardness that surrounded them, finally ripped them all out of the thoughts that they had fled into. "So, where can I win the most money in the slightest time?" He asked grinning.

Sara chuckled. "Oh I am sure we can find some place for you."

"But maybe we take you to your hotel first." Grissom said, feeling that Sara, although she pretended to be okay, tensed more and more whenever she felt her mother's eyes on her.

Grissom and Ben carried the luggage to Grissom's car, Sara and Ben took seat on the back seats and Laura took seat on the passengers seat in the front of the car. The drive to the hotel were the most awkward twenty minutes that both, Grissom and Sara, ever had to go through.

When they stopped in front of the hotel Sara helped the men to get the luggage out of the car again.

"So we'll meet tonight at the restaurant then." Grissom said, shaking hands with Ben.

"See you at six pm Benny." Sara said smiling, hugging her brother. Grissom could see how glad she was that Ben was there, he knew that Sara wouldn't be able to stand all this when only her mother would have been there.

"I'm looking forward to this…who pays by the way, just asking to know if I can risk loosing money." Ben joked.

"When you continue asking then you will pay." Sara winked.

"We will pay." Grissom told him then.

"Something to celebrate?" Ben asked raising an eyebrow.

"Maybe." Sara said and shrugged.

In that moment Laura joined them. This time Sara managed to stay calm. "I hope you will like the hotel."

Laura smiled softly. "I am sure that we will."

"See you two tonight at the restaurant then." Sara forced a smile and nodded softly.

After Ben and Laura had entered the hotel Grissom and Sara entered their car again. Sara leaned back and took a deep breath before she buckled up. Grissom slowly reached out for her hand. "Everything okay?"

"I still feel sick, but I'm less nervous when I think about tonight." She answered after a moment.

"I'm proud of you." He softly squeezed her hand.

She smiled and turned to him. "I love you so much."

He smirked. "I love you more."

She shook her head. "I don't think that's possible."

She leaned over to him as far as her seatbelt allowed it, then he closed the gap between them. They shared a long kiss until she suddenly broke away from him.

First he didn't understand why, but then he did. "I guess we better search for a bathroom, do we?"

Sara bit down on her bottom lip and nodded.

Grissom sighed. "My poor Honey."

* * *

TBC

Is there anything you did not like about this chap? Something you liked? Feel free to tell me. But don't hit me for the OOC-ness of this story, it's the sequel of **the favor** and that story was so OOC that this sequel actually can't be any better.


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I do not own CSI, sadly...

AN: next chapter, I hope you like it. I think there will be three more chapters... maybe four.

Summary: Now it's Grissom whom Gretchen tries to convince to make her a grandmother.

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chapter 5

Grissom had told Sara to lie down in bed and get some rest and she had reluctantly agreed. He brought her some tea and sat down on the edge of the mattress, kissing her softly on her forehead. "How do you feel?" He asked after a while.

"Better. I think I just didn't feel well because of all the tension and… I was so nervous…"

"…promise me to go to a doctor as soon as the holidays are over." He softly caressed her cheek.

Sara rolled with her eyes. "I am okay." She insisted.

Grissom sighed and gave up. He knew that when Sara did not want to do something, it was impossible to convince her to do it. He stood up, leaned forward and kissed her softly, then he headed for the door.

When he opened it Muffin entered the room, running over to Sara, frantically wagging with his tail. He hopped on the bed and snuggled into Sara's lap. Grissom smirked and watched the scene for a moment, then he entered the living room.

Gretchen was sitting on the sofa and flicked through the pages of a forensic magazine. Grissom sat down next to her and she looked up. /I can't believe you're interested in this./

Grissom chuckled. /You will never stop questioning my reasons to become a scientist, will you/

Gretchen shrugged. /How is Sara/

/She says that she feels better but I am not so sure if she's telling the truth./

/Why should she lie/

/Because she wants to stay strong. She does not want to show any weakness but in fact this meeting with her mother is tearing her up./

/You never told me anything about her family. I stopped asking because I figured that maybe something was wrong… she is scared of her mother? Or meeting her mother… why/

Grissom sighed. /I did not tell you because I was not sure if Sara would want me to. It took her five years before she was able to tell me… Her father was abusive and both her parents had strong alcohol problems. When she was twelve years old her mother killed her father in self-defense. Sara had to spend a year in foster care, then she was sent back to her mother, what was even worse for her. When she was seventeen she got a scholarship at Harvard and could finally escape from the nightmare that she had to go through everyday at home. And since she left her hometown for Harvard she did not see her mother, until today. She finally managed to really deal with her past and she thought she was ready to meet her mother today, but… I am not sure if she really was./

Gretchen was really affected by what Grissom told her. /The poor girl./

Grissom nodded. /Life treated her really unfair… Mom do me a favor, please don't tell her that I told you all this. I will tell her when the time is right. And don't pity her, this is what she hates the most./

/Okay./ She sighed. /Is that why you tell her that you would not want to have children? Do you fear that she could not be a good mother/

/What? No! No… I think she would be a wonderful mother./

/Why do you not want to have children with her then? I mean…/

/I…don't think that I could be a good father./ He confessed. But that was only half the truth. He knew that Sara was scared of becoming a mother. He did not want to push her into something that she feared and he wanted to let her take her time until she would feel that she was ready for it. But he wouldn't tell this to Gretchen, because he knew his mother. She would run to Sara and would do everything to convince her that she would be a great mother and that she would be more than ready for it. And that would only cause more trouble.

/I think you would be a wonderful father Gil. I mean with giving up your job so that you could be together with Sara you showed how much you love her. Don't you think that a child would be the greatest evidence for the love that you two share? And do you remember Anne Parker's child? You took care of him so well./

/Mom, I was seventeen back then and had a crush on Anne, of course I wanted to be her son's babysitter./

Gretchen chuckled. /Oh well, that would be a great story to tell _your_ son, don't you think/

/I doubt that. Listen Mom, I know that you are on a mission, you want to become a grandmother, I can understand that you really want this, but you can't force me and Sara to become parents just because you want us to. I promise you that one day Sara and I will have children, but I can't promise you that this is going to be anytime soon./ He had not planned to make such a promise. He cursed himself for it, but now he couldn't change it anymore.

/That makes me happy./ Gretchen smiled softly. /I think that… you know for me it always seemed as if you were searching for something that completed you for all your life and I think first you thought that this could be your work. But then you found Sara and she completed the biggest part of your life. There's only one part missing… and I think that a child would be that part./

Grissom did not want to believe his mother's theory. But a part of him thought that she might be right. One thing was definitely right, for a long time he had been thinking that is work could complete his life and then he had been proven wrong, he had realized that it was Sara who could complete it and since he was with Sara he was happier than he had ever been before.

/When I told your father that I was pregnant, he was so scared. He was horribly scared of becoming a father until the nurse handed you over to him. Then he held you in his arms and from then on all his fear was gone./

Grissom smirked. /Isn't it always like that? That seems to be the standard story that parents tell their children when they fear to become parents themselves./

Gretchen grinned. /I guess that's right./

Grissom pulled his mother into his embrace. /Thank you Mom./ He signed after he pulled away.

/Thank you for what/ she asked slightly confused.

Grissom shrugged and winked at her, a boyish grin on his lips.

* * *

TBC

when you liked it, or disliked it, please tell me : )

thanks for reading!


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I sadly do not own CSI or Grissom and Sara : (

AN: only one or two more chapters... don't know it exactly. I just want to finally finish most of my WIP stories so I am going to hurry up lol

Summary: it's dinner time and for Sara that means another meeting with her mother.

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chapter 6

Sara leaned back in the seat, her eyes were closed and she was slowly counting down from ten to zero, trying to calm down. Grissom reached out for her hand and slowly caressed it with his thumb. Then he squeezed it softly.

She turned her face to him and opened her eyes, a weak smile on her lips. "I'm scared." She confessed.

He squeezed her hand again. "I promise that everything will be alright." He whispered, wishing that he could pull her into his arms, but he had to focus on driving.

Sara sighed and closed her eyes again. Telling herself that Grissom was right and that even if something would happen, he would be with her, would take care of her and would help her.

"By the way, today I was my mother's victim, the grandchild theme…"

Sara grinned and opened her eyes again."And?"

"I think I managed quite well to get out of the situation."

Sara raised an eyebrow. "How?"

Grissom cleared his throat. "Well…"

Sara sighed. "It can't be good when you start with 'well'…you did not promise her a grandchild for her birthday, did you?"

"Not exactly."

Sara's eyes widened. "What did you promise her then?"

"Only that one day, we might have children." He told her after a while.

"Did you say the word 'might'?" Sara asked suspecting that there was more.

Grissom sighed and pretended to be occupied with driving and unable to answer.

Sara stared at him for a while, then she broke the silence. "Are you going to answer my question or can I take it as a 'no' that you're keeping quiet?"

No answer, he only bit down on his bottom lip.

"So, instead of might you said 'will'? Or…"

"Do you really plan to never have children?" He asked interrupting her.

Sara was taken aback by his question. She swallowed hard, not so sure if she could still answer this question with a yes, in fact what Gretchen had told her at the airport had made her thinking. But Grissom did not want to have any children, he had told her more than once, they had been talking about it often enough. And when Grissom didn't want to have children, thenshe wanted the same. "Yes…" she answered hesitantly. "…why are you asking?"

"I just wanted to know." He said softly.

He pulled into the parking lot and turned off the engine of the car. "There we are. Ready?" he asked her and she nodded. He took a deep breath. "Then let's go." He took her hand into his again and brought it up to his lips. He softly kissed her knuckles and then her ring finger. "Finally you can wear your ring again." He whispered and she chuckled.

"Yeah, I already felt totally naked without it." She said grinning.

"Sadly you only _felt_ naked."

Sara rolled with her eyes. "You know how to turn nervousness into embarrassment Babe."

Grissom stuck his tongue out at her.

Sara raised her eyebrow. "Do I have to remind you how good I can pillow fight?"

Gretchen cleared her throat and Grissom turned to her.

/Are we going to have dinner or is this a drive-in cinema without a movie/ she signed hastily. /I don't want to complain but I'm hungry./

Grissom chuckled. /Sorry Mom./ He opened his door and left the car, then he walked over to Gretchen's door, opened it and helped her out of the car.

He was about to do the same for Sara but she had already left the car and was now trying to gain control over her skirt which was dangerously flattering in the wind.

Grissom laughed softly and Sara shot an angry look at him. "_Not_ funny!"

Grissom pulled her into his arms and kissed her forehead. "It is Honey but I will pretend that it's not, okay?"

"Only half okay." She returned still slightly angry.

Grissom guided Sara and his mother into the restaurant.

They had just taken seat at their table when Laura and Ben arrived. When their drinks had been served and they had ordered their meal Grissom softly nudged Sara with his elbow. She turned to him.

"Now or after dinner?" Grissom asked whispering into her ear.

A soft smile flashed over her lips. "Now." She answered whispering, leaning closer to him.

"Okay." He whispered back.

"Uhm, do you want us to leave you two alone for a moment?" Ben asked grinning.

Grissom cleared his throat. "We have to tell you something." At the same time he signed what he was saying, so that Gretchen did not have to read from his lips.

Sara smiled softly, her hand resting on Grissom's thigh.

"I am not good with words but still Sara wanted me to be the one who is going to make this official. So, I'm going to try to find the best words." He paused for a second and glanced at Sara who nodded softly to signalize him that she was ready. "One year ago I finally managed to confess my feelings to Sara and ever since this moment she makes me the happiest man under the sun, every single day. Words can not describe how happy she makes me and I want this happiness to last for the rest of our lives. Three weeks ago I… I asked her to marry me and…she said 'yes'."

"You're going to marry?" Ben asked still a little unbelieving.

Sara lifted up her hand, showing them her engagement ring.

Gretchen's eyes widened and she almost jumped up, pulling Sara into her arms as soon as she was standing. Sara hugged Gretchen back and soon her brother was waiting for her to pull away from Gretchen, so that he could also congratulate her.

Gretchen embraced Grissom while Ben pulled Sara into his arms. "Congratulations little sis."

And also Laura left her seat, she walked over to Grissom and congratulated him, then she turned to Sara, who had just pulled away from Ben. Laura softly smiled at her daughter and Sara smiled back.

Then Laura walked over to her and the two women embraced each other for a long time. "Congratulations my little angel." Laura whispered and Sara felt how tears ran down her cheeks. "Thank you Mom." She wiped the tears away with the back of her hand and then slowly pulled away from her mother.

Then Sara turned to Grissom and he put his arm around her shoulders. He softly kissed her on the forehead and her smile turned brighter.

"Hey, can't we get a real kiss?" Ben asked grinning.

Grissom smirked and shot an asking look at Sara. The look in her eyes was challenging him. She grinned and then she pulled him close to her. Her lips met his in a soft kiss, that he returned, trying to not get too passionate. When their lips loosened from each other he held her close to his chest with his right arm. "And now drinks for everyone."

* * *

TBC

I know this was boring, sorry...I just couldn't come up with something better today : (


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I do now own CSI

AN: One more chapter after this one. Enjoy reading!

Summary: Sara and Laura are talking in the restaurant's restroom... Laura has a certain suspicion...

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chapter 7

Sara stared into the mirror, smiling at herself. The evening had been much better than she thought it could be. She was about to leave the restroom when her mother entered.

"Hey, everything okay?" Laura asked concerned.

"Sure." She looked back into the mirror and brushed a strand of hair out of her face.

"Sara… I don't know if we will have another chance to talk while I am here so… I… I just wanted to tell you that…" Laura took a deep breath. "…I can understand why you did not want to see me or talk to me in all these years. I am sorry for everything I did to you, but I know that saying sorry doesn't bring your childhood back to you."

Sara nodded. "I was…pretty angry about…all that, but not anymore. I am happy now. For the first time in my life I am really happy." She smiled softly at her mother.

"I…I can't put into words how glad I am that… that you found someone who loves you, who respects you, who takes care of you…" tears rose up in her eyes. "I hope your life is going to be as wonderful as you hope it will be. Because there is no-one in the world who deserves this as much as you do."

Sara felt that she was close to cry. There had been so many things that she wanted to say to her mother, so much anger that had been there for years, that now was suddenly gone. She would never be able to forget, but in this moment, she had forgiven.

"I know I never showed it to you, but Sara…I love you." Laura almost whispered.

Now Sara started to cry, she first tried to wipe the tears away with the back of her hand, but there were just too many of them. Laura pulled her daughter into her arms and Sara embraced her mother, sobbingly leaning her head against her shoulder. "I missed you Mom." Sara whispered softly.

"I missed you too my little honey."

Mother and daughter remained in their embrace for a long time. When Sara pulled away she smiled softly. "I am so glad that you are here Mom."

"I am glad that you invited us over."

Both women smiled at each other.

"Oh my God, the others probably already started a big search after us." Sara suddenly noticed how long they had already been in the restroom.

Laura chuckled. "Oh you're right… but before we leave, I have to ask you something."

Sara raised an eyebrow.

Laura smiled softly. "I've been wondering…you know, I mean a mother…senses when her daughter…even though… anyways, those stomach cramps, when do you have them?"

Sara sensed what her mother thought. "No Mom…never. I… no that's not possible."

Now Laura raised an eyebrow. "Are you sure?"

"The last weeks were totally stressing me, I worked double shifts, I had to organize the whole Christmas stuff, I was really nervous to…meet you and Ben and…" Sara leaned back against the counter with the washing basins. "…all this just…I mean I really feel much better now."

"Okay."

Sara rolled with her eyes. "You know, this is really something we _do_ have in common, when we say 'okay' we usually don't mean it."

Laura smirked. "It's just… a feeling I have. I mean I could be wrong, we haven't seen each other for so long and I can not really judge about this but… it's your aura I guess."

"Aura?" Sara asked unbelieving.

"I know what you're thinking. You're asking yourself if I smoked something." Laura said and winked.

Sara chuckled. "Mom, I really don't think that you're right with your theory. I mean I do not at all react to any smells or something, coffee doesn't make me feel sick either…"

"I was able to drink coffee through all my pregnancies."

Sara shook her head. "But we both don't want to have children, at least not now. I can't be pregnant."

"You think when you don't want something it doesn't happen?"

"I'm not stupid Mom. I know that it can happen and it's of course not impossible that it happens but…"

"When was your last…you know…" Laura asked after a moment.

"Mom I am _not _pregnant." Sara protested.

Laura shot an asking look at her.

Sara sighed. "It has never been regular… maybe a month ago… or two. I don't know."

"Sara you're not sixteen anymore. You should know things like these!"

Sara rolled with her eyes. "Mom… you're walking on thin ice here." She warned.

Laura opened her mouth to say something but then she knew better and kept still. She nodded softly. "You're right. I'm sorry."

Sara smiled softly. "We should not start fighting again… we should be over that."

"Right."

"We should go back to the other's now." Sara said.

"Yeah, but we should probably re-fresh our make-up." Laura suggested smirking.

Sara raised an eyebrow. Laura pointed at the mirror. Sara looked into the mirror, noticing that her mascara and eyeliner had been moistened by her tears and was scattered all over her face. She chuckled. "You don't happen to have waterproofed mascara, do you?"

Laura rummaged through her purse and after a couple of moments she handed Sara her mascara. "I hope that this one still works."

While Sara was fighting with the mascara Laura watched her. Sara's hand was shaking, but not because of her mother but because of what her mother had said. What if her mother was right? Sara had never trusted her mother's 'spiritual suspicions' but this was not a situation in which she should simply deny that these suspicions could indeed be right.

After a while Sara put down the mascara and sighed.

"Everything okay?" Laura asked.

"About that… aura thing…" Sara started.

"…I did not mean to baffle you."

"You did not…it's just…" Sara cleared her throat. "About two months ago we…I know I shouldn't have done this…but… it was just…in the heat of the moment…and…"

"So you could be pregnant."

Sara desperately glanced around the room, then she looked at her mother again. "Gil does not want to have children."

"He's a good guy, he's not going to leave you just because you got pregnant." Laura tried to clam Sara down.

"That's not it. We talked about this theme and we both agreed that children weren't the right… 'thing' for us. He… he will be so shocked."

"You don't know if you really are pregnant honey. Maybe I was just wrong, I mean we haven't seen each other for such a long time, I could easily be wrong."

"How often have you been wrong with that before?"

Laura thought for a moment, then she bit down on her bottom lip. "Not very often."

"As in 'two to ten times' or as in 'only once'?" Sara asked sounding slightly scared.

"As in 'never'." Laura softly squeezed Sara's hand.

Sara ran her hand through her hair and then sighed. "Damn."

* * *

TBC

_girly-do_ your were absolutely right with what you were thinking ;)

thanks for reading: ) and for the nice reviews I got : ) I hope that you will like the last chapter, it should be up on saturday.


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: I do not own CSI or Grissom and Sara

AN: last chapter, many thanks for reading! I hope you liked it at least a bit. ( and YAY! finally I finished one of my WIPs! next one to finish will be **shattered hearts and resurrected dreams** _(read that one when you like angst)_ and then only one more to go and then I'm free, lol )

Summary: Sara has news for Grissom... how will he react?

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chapter 8

Sara leaned in the doorframe and silently observed Grissom for a while. She wondered how she could find the right words but she was just too nervous to think.

Muffin was lying next to Grissom on her blanket, turning from his side on his back from time to time trying to win Grissom's attention. When the puppy began to bark Grissom's eyes loosened from the book and he looked at Muffin, shaking his head. "Buddy what's up? You got your food, you got your water, we went for a walk two times this evening… you even got your dog cookies."

Muffin barked again. Grissom put his book on the nightstand and now noticed Sara. "Hey." He smiled softly at her.

"Hey." She whispered.

"Everything okay Honey?" He put off his reading glasses and placed them next to the book on the nightstand.

Sara shrugged and walked over to the bed. She hesitantly sat down on the mattress. Grissom leaned forward, placing his hand on her shoulder. "Honey?" He asked again, sounding concerned.

She turned to him, reaching up, placing her hand on his. "We have to talk." She was still whispering.

He nodded softly. "Good…because…there is something I would really like to talk about with you."

Sara skidded further on the mattress and leaned back against the backrest, she crossed her legs and turned her face to him. "You first." She said softly.

He shook his head. "I'm a gentlemen. Ladies first."

Sara sighed and leaned her head back, she closed her eyes for a moment and then took a deep breath. "When we were in the restaurant, the day before yesterday, I had a conversation with my mother."

"In the restroom, I know."

"Yeah… my mother…made a comment about…well, she had a certain suspicion…or feeling or whatever. I am not really into her spiritual hippie or whatever things. She said it was something about my 'aura' that made herthink that… well she suspected something." Her hands were shaking. She was scared. She was scared of his reaction. Even though she had not wanted it before, she wanted this baby now. Their baby. She had been thinking about it since this morning when her doctor had confirmed her mother's suspicion… she would be a mother and she would be a good mother. She would give her child all the love that it needed and she would always be there for her child.

"What did she suspect?" Grissom threw an asking look at her.

"I went to see a doctor this morning." She glanced at him. "And… he confirmed what my mother suspected."

"What did your mother suspect?" He asked again.

She swallowed hard and tried to avoid to meet his gaze.

"Sara? Is something wrong?" He turned his body to her. "Honey, what ever it is, you know you can always talk with me… nothing, nothing could ever…"

"I'm pregnant…" she said almost not audible. She turned her face into the opposite direction, she did not want to see his reaction, the expression in his face… She felt tears rising up in her eyes.

"You are pregnant?" he asked unbelieving, but not shocked, different from what she had expected.

She did not react to his question, so he reached out for her shoulder. "Sara?"

"I'm so sorry." She whispered and the tears started to run down her cheeks.

"Sara that is nothing you have to feel sorry about." Now he _was_ shocked.

Sara cried harder, Grissom quickly got up and hurried to her side of the bed. He sat down on the edge of the mattress and pulled her into his arms. "God Sara… what did you think?" His left hand was on her back and his right slipped from her neck to the back of her head, softly running through her hair. "Sara… oh my God Sara, what did you think? That I would be mad at you?" In his voice was a mixture of shock and despair.

She leaned her forehead against his shoulder and sobbed for a long time until she managed to look up. Now she felt even worse. Grissom was not angry or mad, but he was disappointed, disappointed because he knew what she had been thinking.

She could hardly bear to face him, his eyes looked so sad. He wiped her tears away from her cheeks and brushed a strand of hair out of her face. "Sara what the hell did you think of me?" He asked softly, sounding even more desperate.

"I thought …because of… what… because… of… what we had planned …and …you …you said…" Her voice was shaking and she began to sob again.

Grissom pulled away from her a bit, he took her hands into his and softly caressed them. She turned her face away, feeling his eyes on her face.

"Sara look at me… please." He almost begged her.

She hesitated, but then he softly squeezed her hands. "Hey Honey, you know how much I love you. I could never be mad at you." He whispered. Feeling slightly better and more able to look at him, she turned her face into his direction.

"Sara, you can't imagine how happy this makes me. I… I mean that you are pregnant." He slid closer to her. "I know what I said before…but after the conversation with my mother I…" He took a deep breath. "This had been what I wanted to talk about with you. I… I wanted to confess that I changed my mind about the 'baby–theme'… " he brought her hands up to his lips and kissed them softly. "I want to have a baby with you Sara."

A smile began to build up on her lips. "You're not mad at me?"

"No. No! Honey, never. I could never be mad at you." He kissed her softly. "Never."

"I feel so stupid." She confessed. "I… I thought you would be mad at me. I'm so sorry. You must think that…" She began to shake again. "I do trust you. Really. And…"

He smiled softly. "I pretended to not want children, I can understand that you… were scared of… I'm not an easy person and you are the one who had to learn that the hard way before we got together." He kissed her again and this time she kissed him back.

After a while he pulled away from her and they smiled at each other. "I'm going to be a Daddy." He whispered, now with a bright smile on his lips.

Sara smirked and kissed him softly. "Yes you are." She whispered back and he let his hands slip over her stomach. His grin turned wider after a moment.

"What?" Sara asked, raising an eyebrow.

"May I tell my mother?"

"She's sleeping."

"She would want to know it as soon as possible!" He left the bed and headed for the door.

"Gil!" Sara called after him. He stopped for a second and turned to her.

"If I would have a brother I would be her most favorite son now." He told her enthusiastically.

"You don't have a brother."

"I would get all the heritage!" He was even more enthusiastic, then he left the room.

"Gil…" She wanted to follow him but then she decided that she was too lazy and she wouldn't be able to stop him anyways. "He does not even have a brother." She told Muffin who was looking at her, with his head tilted to the right. She shook her head and crawled the puppy behind its ears. "If he would always be that enthusiastic we would never get out of our bed." She sighed.

Muffin rolled on his back. "You don't understand that anyways." She sat the dog on her lap. "Oh Gosh I am talking with a dog… I can't fall any deeper, can I?" The dog whined. "Don't answer, that was a rhetorical question." Sara smirked. "I bet the baby is going to get all the heritage." She stuck her tongue out at the dog. "Don't you think?"

Muffin barked and Sara grinned, taking his barking as a 'yes'.

* * *

THE END

thanks everyone for reading : ) I hope you liked it at least a bit.


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